To be a housewife in 2015

   Let me begin by saying that I am by no means ashamed of what I do. I work as hard as some women, less than others, and probably harder than a few. But being a housewife always earns me a few sideways glances and a certain level of disrespect. I feel like I am doing the job both God and I have always planned for myself. I am very domestic at heart and have never felt at home in the workplace. So when I met my husband almost four years ago we immediately discussed the possibility of this lifestyle for ourselves and our family. We understood the consequences and the rewards of having a single income for our family.  

Buttermilk

   I ended up going back to work for about eight months at a church well over an hour away from our home. It was a temporary job to help pad our bank account for building our current home and partially fund our wedding. This was the first time I had ever held a job while in a serious relationship and it was just not going well for us. I left before 6:30am every morning and didn't come home until 5pm. I was struggling to keep up with housework, laundry, dishes, cooking, shopping, wedding planning, and gardening.  This is where a lot of people began to assume things about my husband and I's relationship. Yes, we do adhere to traditional gender roles. Yes, I knew that from the beginning and I'm more than okay with it. But with the stress of wedding planning, building our first home, my domestic chores, and my new job- I was drowning. I've struggled with depression since my early teens and it started hitting me hard during this period. My husband finally drew the line when they denied me a full week off for my honeymoon, despite agreeing to it during the hiring process.

Gingersnap

   This is when my life as a housewife really began. I was finally able to finish planning our wedding with two weeks left to go! And after a blissful honeymoon we settled into our roles as husband and wife. Everything is more difficult with one income but it has really taught me how to budget and manage our money with an iron grip. My husband is also very happy to come home and truly be able to relax. Because I'm home all the time I'm able to do all the shopping, run all our errands, pay our bills, manage our money, keep a clean home, prepare breakfast and lunch for my husband, feed our chickens, take care of our garden, do our laundry, etc. We also plan to run a small farm in the near future where we'll grow a majority of our own food, and butcher our own meat. I feel I also need to mention my husband and I planned the home we built accordingly to our lifestyle. We went with a steel building for durability, low taxes, and inexpensive materials

Salt & Pepper

    So why do I still get the sideways glances? I work hard. I take care of my husband and someday, hopefully soon, I'll also be taking care of our children. I'm just sick and tired of the assumptions that I sit on my ass all day and watch soap operas. My husband and I are a team and work together like a well oiled machine. Being a housewife or a stay at home mom does not make you any less successful than a career woman. If that's what you choose to do with your life, and you work your hardest at it, then there is no shame. So, why is it so looked down on? Why do some people assume that gender roles make you weak? I feel that it's up to the individual and couple to decide what your role is in a relationship and it's no one elses business or place to judge that decision. There are women out there who are able to work full time and manage a household (my mother) but I'm not ashamed to admit I'm not that woman, and that's okay.

Colleen  P.